The comments on this article will probably be worse than the idea itself, but, err, cute!
The world is a tough place, and we all know some guys who are taking on the world’s biggest challenges, fighting for their right to have an equal say in the decision-making process. Are these guys sucking? Of course they’re not, and they are the real heroes in a career in which the pen is mightier than the sword. Still, sometimes, not even that lucky person can get everything right all the time. If it all goes pear-shaped, the cards are on the table, and the stork is on the way. For those in this stage of life, here are some helpful pointers for at least maintaining the fatherhood-male balance.
But just as John Perkins realised in his Alpha Male, he had a hand in some rather great advice for women too — the tips usually failed to apply to him, but we’re just highlighting them because they perfectly capture the way the male of the species can sometimes attempt to make life a little easier by offering etiquette tips on taking care of relationships with the opposite sex.
I think, if you are particularly ambitious you can’ve a professional partnership with your baby…
I don’t mean to sound like a dolt here, but I don’t think that. Jokes aside, we all have very generous impulses and, should we be willing to set them free, it might just work. For example, for the opposite sex when you are at work, your professional duties tend to mainly seem to override your personal life. So, instead of being a perfectly professional partner, you sometimes wind up feeling like your partner is a distraction. When you need to really be professional, you need to remove the baby — and the living thing it carries — from your environment. So, this is how men behave during those times:
Constant dialogue is never a good thing, because it can be constraining, and therefore disrespectful. That’s why you know what the conversation should be about. It has to be something concrete.
Friends shouldn’t be in the same room at the same time. That could get embarrassing.
That’s true. In order to distinguish between your professional relationships and your personal relationships, you really have to go through your personal relationships very carefully, leaving them at the door.
What I think it comes down to here is how little respect for this other half we have.
At work, this seems to come down to whether you are treating your career as a professional relationship, or whether you are treating your career like a professional relationship, the whole time. If you are treating your career as a relationship, then you need to confine your discussions to facts and figures and to fewer questions about the logistics of your next move.
At home, work should pretty much leave your relationship to your wife, because sometimes, her issues are more important than your own.
This does not mean that your wife should always be your priority. Some problems transcend professional boundaries and can’t be answered by a professional. That might require cooperation from her. There’s a part of me that would like to keep the homemaking running on its own. But maybe I don’t have to.
Perhaps this is something that needs to be more discussed, perhaps it needs to be codified and standardized within families and workplaces, perhaps it needs to be a matter of education and training of every group and industry. But it will probably only be done as part of a much more thoughtful, thoughtful, respectful dialogue between mothers and fathers and between families and entire industries. I would hate to think that this discussion will occur without any meaningful input or awareness on the part of those in power, or that policymakers will never admit the need for dialogue, even when it demands such.
Anyway, there you have it. For the conversations concerning “professional conversation”, see my advice to John Perkins.
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